Friday, January 14, 2011

The Green Hornet Film; The Original Is Better

 I don't even have the words for how infuriated I am right now with The Green Hornet film. There's a small part of me that wishes I could just throw a brick at Seth Rogen's crotch right now, because he absolutely deserves it along with director Michael Gondry. That's right, the director of the film Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind which to me was a good movie is responsible for this equally terrible movie.
 I do feel much of the blame lies with the fact that Seth Rogen co-wrote this screenplay and he claimed that he was so glad he didn't screw up one of his favorite childhood heroes. Seth, Seth, Seth....tsk tsk, someone's a dirty rotten liar Seth. Why must you constantly lie to us Seth? The truth is you messed up completely! In the original radio show, comics, and T.V. Show Britt Reid wasn't a moron. He was a smart successful newspaper publisher, he was confident, and he could fight well alongside his equally confident sidekick Kato. I loved the T.V. show and I loved the comic. I loved watching The Green Hornet on Kung Fu Saturday when I was a kid. That was the highlight of my Saturday. I would watch a couple of episodes of The Green Hornet and then watch the featured kung fu film. That's a sacred childhood memory and you, Seth Rogen along with your director have pissed all over it.
Not only did you make Britt Reid a total jerk, you made him stupid too! He loosely based Britt Reid on Paris Hilton? Are you kidding me with this nonsense?
 Seth Rogen's Britt Reid is a spoiled rich brat who shows no interest in running the newspaper, but he instead becomes buddies with Kato his mechanic and coffee maker. I felt bad for Jay Chou because he's no Bruce Lee, but he did alright in spite of Seth Rogen constantly hyperventilating and shouting in every scene. He tried, he really did. Cameron Diaz's role as Reid's secretary Lenore Case is completely useless. She's basically camera filler with a great smile.
 Of course, The Green Hornet has to have a villain and that is Christoph Waltz (Oscar winner from Inglorious Basterds) as Chudnofsky, but there is no depth to the character which proves bad writing is bad writing. Now I like action scenes as much as the next person, but it's as if Seth Rogen got bored and just added as much action as possible as filler rather than having an actual plot that tells the story. There's also so much pointless dialogue, watching this train wreck of a film is like being stuck in a dentist's chair having a root canal with no anesthesia. Yes, it's that damn bad. Not even the overpriced 3-D could save this film. That is just a gimmick to get more money out of people and this film proved that point real quick.
 There is so much that could have been done to make this film version of the T.V. show great, but none of it was done. Instead, we get a film that is so terrible with no plot at all, a fake Britt Reid (I don't care what you say Rogen, that character you played was NOT Britt Reid! You are a liar sir!), a subdued Kato that got overshadowed by the crazy rich brat, a useless vapid secretary, and a villain that's about as threatening as a labradoodle. Seth Rogen and Michale Gondry you should be ashamed and embarrassed that your names are on this piece of trash.
 Don't waste your money on this folks and certainly don't waste it on 3-D. The original is better and I'm sure that Mr. Rogen's going to have several bricks thrown at his crotch for even writing this awful screenplay. Just please, do us a favor and go sit in the corner with M. Night Shyamalan and quit making movies, because you really screwed the pooch on this one pal.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Of Sackboys, Dragon Ages, And A Bulletstorm

Well, I hope everyone had a happy holiday season. Ours was quite nice. Now, it's time to get back into the swing of things, so we'll start off with a few of the games that I'm excited about playing in the new year. First up, is Little Big Planet 2. I loved the first game, and love it still. With a great musical soundtrack and levels that are actually fun to play through a second time or more, Little Big Planet has a lot going for it. I also loved the designs and artwork for each world. There's never a dull moment in the game, and there's so many things you can do such as designing your own challenging stage, trying on different costumes on your sackboy or sackgirl,  or even trying out stages that other players have designed online. The possibilities are endless.
 While I was a little disappointed that the developers for Little Big Planet 2 pushed back the release date to January 18th, I do understand that they want the sequel game to be even more fun than the first and they want to do it right. However, I am glad that the wait for this game will be over soon.
 Bulletstorm is intriguing to me. After reading up on it, I have to admit I was a bit dismayed to see it evolved into a first person shooter. The reason for that reaction is I tend to get incredibly bad vertigo playing in a first person point of view. Borderlands camera angles that bobbed like a yo-yo were so bad that I actually thought I was going to be physically ill. Unfortunately, I had gotten the game for the 360 so there was no way to turn that bobbing motion off, but I found you could turn off for the PC version. I still do not understand why they didn't have that feature for the 360 version. It would have been nice! So, I was a little hesitant when I was reading up on how the developers for Bulletstorm had decided it worked better as a first person shooter. I mean, the concept art for the game was amazing and  I have to say I was a sucker for the artwork for the giant monster plants. It had potential to me from all the articles I read, so I found myself being excited about it.
 Then I hear about the first person shooter deal and I'm torn. I've been waiting for this game for months and genuinely excited ever since I first heard about it. I decided to try and keep an open mind and check out their website. I'm glad I did. The sample trailer they had blew me away. Yes, it's a first person shooter, but it made me hopeful. It looked great and I think I could actually play this without getting raging bouts of vertigo. The camera was spot on and didn't do odd angles, and just the few minutes they showed looked great. I got excited about Bulletstorm all over again. I was pleasantly surprised and now I can't wait for this game to be released. 
 Next of course is Dragon Age 2. I loved Dragon Age and played through all the story lines, did all the side quests, and played through all the downloadable content, (I'm a nerd people, this is what I do) loving every minute of it. I even played all the angles of every possible romance. Yes, all of them. The story was brilliant and wonderfully written, making you care about each and every character. It even made me really hate the super villains and the ambiguous ones. I did love the aspect of good and evil was not black and white here, there were shades of gray and your decisions affected each part of the story in some way.
 As soon as I heard about Dragon Age 2, I began reading all the articles voraciously, writing down dates, notes, and reminders to myself that I absolutely wanted this game. My good friend Gary informed me of the preorder deal they had for fans of the game, which I checked out. It was a limited edition preorder where you could get downloadable content titled The Exiled Prince as well as a downloadable soundtrack and exclusive in-game weapons. The cutoff date was January 11th. I made it in time thanks to my wonderful husband Ron, who ordered it for me.  For those who missed the limited edition boat, you can get The Exiled Prince on XBOX Live after the March launch, but it will cost you 560 MS Points. A bit steep, but at least it will be available to others who wish to play it.
 Release dates for the games listed are: Little Big Planet 2 Januray 18, 2011
                                                           Bulletstorm February 22, 2011
                                                           Dragon Age 2 March 8, 2011
 There are so many more games coming out this year that I am looking forward to, but these are the games that will be out in the first three months of 2011, and I'm ecstatic that they're finally going to be here. It looks like 2011 is going to be a promising gaming year.